5.) Which Actor Were You Enamored With the Most?
This one took a lot of introspection to answer. my automatic reaction was to assume it’s the current one, but I was different people when I followed the individual actors closely and so they each fulfilled different needs for me, which makes it hard to measure how each affected me in a way that can be scaled as ‘most’ or ‘least’. so I tried to put current feelings aside and remember what it felt like without getting too deep about it, like a ‘think fast’ reflex to put me in that past headspace, and then compare. when I think back to that time when each dominated my thoughts, here are some of the things I remember:
I remember saving pictures of Christian Bale to my newly formed Photobucket account and how quickly the pages filled up. I remember watching a behind the scenes photoshoot and realizing how shy, and not intimidating, he was. I remember gathering up my used books and CDs to trade at the used book store so that I could collect as many DVDs of his movies that I could (I stopped at 14). I remember how I talked about him so passionately on the fan forum I frequented, praising his acting skill and lamenting how misunderstood he seemed to be. I remember watching him sing Santa Fe in the Newsies movie and having such a warm feeling in my heart for him, and how I vowed to sing that song aloud if I ever visited Santa Fe. that video still makes me feel that way.
I remember loving the way Robert Pattinson jumped on his Goblet of Fire costar in a full arms and legs hug and how cute he was when Emma said he looked manly. I remember him filming Remember Me on the streets of NYC and how the paparazzi shots of him lighting a cigarette memorized me. I remember the button fly jeans and the blue sweater and the way he could bend his thumb back until it touched his wrist. I remember listening to his raw live version of I Was Broken on repeat and feeling so connected to the emotion in his voice. that performance still makes me feel that way.
I remember watching Richard Armitage in a BBC interview for Robin Hood and liking the way he seemed to really care about his character of Sir Guy. I remember thinking he gave off a classic Cary Grant vibe in a photoshoot with yellow cabs in NYC. I remember thinking how cute he was when he was bashful and how funny he was in the fan messages and how shocked I was when I learned he used to be a dancer. I remember how impressed I was with him in The Crucible and how scared I was with the masked Dragon and how sad I was about Lucas. I still tear up when I watch the rooftop scene.
I remember when Jamie Dornan sang My Burning Sun in a random back alleyway and walked through traffic in Levi Jeans. I remember the funny walk demonstration and how musical his Belfast accent sounded any time I heard him speak. I remember how cute Graham the Sheriff was and how intense Paul the stalker was and the way Fifty said Ms. Steele. I remember how he teased Cillian, and the 41 Irish terms for drunk, and the Five Guys selfie. cheeseburgers still make me think of him.
I remember the way Dan Stevens’ hair fell across his forehead when he admitted his crush for Private Benjamin. I remember how seductively he read Madame Bovary and how happy he seemed anytime he was wearing a hat. I remember how sweet it was when he talked about his kids and how romantic it was when he talked about his wife and how hilarious it was when he shouted out Curling terms. I remember how cool it was to hear him sing Behind Blue Eyes, and how goofy he looked dancing in The Late Late Show parking lot. the color aquamarine still reminds me of him.
I remember how excited Ansel Elgort was to get his picture taken with Ryan Gosling, and how cute it was when he pulled up his suspender while Swing dancing, and how funny it was when he ran that stop sign with Josh Horowitz. I remember how utterly blown away I was when he crooned out Sunday Morning on The Late Late Show… or I’ve Never Been in Love Before at his cousin’s wedding…. or Maria on the closed set of West Side Story. I remember how hard I fell for his Brooklyn Brownstone, and how charmed I was with his smile. I’m still a sucker for both
I remember how cute it was when Joe Keery messed up his rap in Empire, and how his voice cracked in the Nintendo commercial, and his ridiculous duck ringtone in the Alex & Tuckie skit. I remember the Dirty Dancing lift with Maika, and his big brother relationship with Gaten, and his praise for Mable the dog. I remember his knees in the Scoops Ahoy uniform and his soft speaking voice and his spot on comedic timing. Poutine still makes me think of him.
I remember Hayden’s dry sense of humor in the Bullrun car rally and Lucky 13 in the Echo Challenge. I remember liking that he was a self proclaimed mama’s boy and how it pulled my heart strings when he said he wasn’t sure if his dad was proud of him. I remember our shared favorite movies and how excited I was to hear him play ragtime on the piano, and how intrigued I was with his eyebrow scar. I remember how the details of his acting felt like a scavenger hunt to follow and not caring if the critics found the treasure or not. I remember the Latin sign in his kitchen that said ‘don’t let the bastards get you down’ and how tangible he seemed in the Mike on Much podcast, and how at peace the thought of his farm made me feel. he still makes me feel that way.
[by all rights, Ewan McGregor should have been included in this reminiscence too but ‘his time’ was over 20 years ago and it’s harder to remember the content that I indulged in without giving it too much thought.]
Enamored can mean different things when applied to different people but overall I think my gut reaction of the answer being Hayden remains the same. but what do you think? many of you have known me over the course of several actor interests, who do you think I was most enamored with?